Sunday, May 22, 2011

May: the good, the bad, & the incredibly ugly

The good: finished the school semester strong, by getting straight A's and landing on the Dean's List. I didn't know tech schools had Deans, so I was doubly surprised. Things are going VERY well with school, and that should put me on track to transfer to UW by the fall of 2012. If I can bang out some things this summer, I might have an easier path than I had anticipated.

The bad: not blogging, and not really feeling a whole hell of a lot of motivation. I still have some emails I need to follow up on too. Sorry, I've just been so burnt out by the good and the ugly that I haven't logged in to blogger in a while.

To make things worse, I woke up to find my external hard drive no longer working. This had all the information from two previous computers, so I just lost about 12 years worth of work. Music, documents, pictures, emails... gone. The estimated price to have the data potentially retrieved? $1000-1200. Ouch.

The ugly: so much for having some things figured out. I crashed and burned hard on a few situations with women in the past month. I won't go into details, since it's been since the end of April, but I've now gone the complete opposite direction with where I see things. I used to assume that no one had any interest in me, dating/attraction wise, since I never saw ANY signals of interest. Now that I understand what to look for, I think I'm seeing it everywhere. I guess that's better, but I got my hopes up in a couple situations, and a couple others that I simply don't have a clue what to do. I still have a ways to go, as evidenced by today's faux pas.

I was doing some shopping for shorts today, and this super cute girl walks all the way across the store to come up to me to ask for help with something. If I had the processing ability to handle this, I wouldn't have said "uhhhhhh... I don't work here" and probably would have said something witty, plus I would have immediately realized that there is almost no way someone could have thought I worked at Old Navy the way I looked. At least I know why I instinctively say stupid shit like that (not fast on my toes and I was caught a little off guard), but it's still frustrating as hell that this continues to be a problem. I guess some "practice" on potential social situations is in order...


  1. a little bit of advice? Go back to thinking nobody is interested.Ive been doing the opposite all my life and now Im like what you were and really, its a better place to be.Atleast now I dont scare people....atleast not so often lol ;-)

  2. Another thing that I have noticed, is that we tend to notice all the little details that nobody else really looks at and we may interpret those in positive ways, later thinking " oh but it was all there", while in fact it was not.When you dont know something for sure and someone doesnt tell you, its better to assume that its better to take it easy for a while OR just straight out ask if they like you.You guys kinda are in a better position than us ladies on that one as you are supposedly the ones chasing or whatever.I never understood games but I do understand one thing.I have to shut up to be alright.You men on the other hand, can jump straight forward and ask someone out and nobody lifts an eyebrow.Try it :-)

  3. Thanks for reading and replying!

    This sound like stuff from the movie, "He's Just Not That Into You" (or whatever it was called), except I'm the one doing it on a smaller scale. LOL

    From what I understand (and I don't, since I'm new to picking up on this), women are the ones that signal attraction through body language, first. Guys are then supposed to pick up on that signal that she's at least interested in what she sees, and walk over and start the conversation. When I don't see these things, I never get a "green light" to approach someone.

    Most of these things I'm running into aren't like that, it's more than I've been talking to people I see while I'm going about my day or my business. The girl at the bank, the woman at the grocery store, the cutie I have a class with, etc.

    I wish it could be so easy as to go back to how things were, but then I'd be guaranteed to not meet anybody. I don't want to go there.

  4. Oh no, I clicked the wrong button and blogger ate my comment.Gaaaah lol

    I was just saying, do it, but leave the too much thinking alone.Its harmless to ask someone out, all you can get is a no.Its interesting trying to decipher people too but its harder ;-)


  5. and there is the risk of reading too much into whats going on.Thats why I said to be careful but I think its good that youre out there trying.


  6. It just seems like I find myself in situations where it's about as hard as can be to figure out what's going on. I got punched in the arm today for being a smartass. I think that's a good sign. :D

    I don't think you clicked anything and lost a comment, unless you hit clear/reset.

  7. My email is

    if you ever want to discuss something or just need an ear.
    I had a blog but deleted it, I tend to do that when I feel weird about things that I write about.
    I have facebook as well and share some of my thoughts there but its set to private and I dont want to give out the name here but I can do it through email.

    Its always nice to have someone to talk to that can relate, although we are all different.
    So, if youre open for having a new friend, just email me, and if not, that is OK too :-)

    Have a wonderful day


  8. Oh about the comment that got lost.I wrote a long one and then I got redirected to a blogger page where asked to start an account.I hit the back-button and the comment box was blank so I had to re write it but had no energy to re write the entire thing.I can never remember one to choose now so I just go with Anonymous and leave a signature instead.